Buddhify Your Brain and Family Life With Mindfulness Meditation

Molly Holmes, LMFT Author

Dec 16, 2021 |

The Mindful Attachment Parenting approach includes many easy to use mindfulness exercises like this mindfulness meditation to help you find more zen!

Buddhify your brain with mindfulness meditation

What is mindfulness? Mindfulness is the capacity to be fully present in the moment—as it is unfolding—without the mind trying to make it different. It requires the cultivation of an “inner witness” that neutrally observes what is happening in your consciousness. In truth, mindfulness begins with awareness. And it allows you to respond with what is called a “beginner’s mind.” This means mind without mind and you experience things as they actually are in the present. Then, you do not have any preconceived ideas, judgments or emotional reactions to them. But you don’t have to be a Zen Buddhist master to master mindfulness meditation. Because there are simple ways to help you enjoy the amazing benefits of mindfulness. And practicing mindfulness meditation is the key to leveraging those benefits and to being able to stay present to parent the way you really want to. Which is why it is the bedrock of the Mindful Attachment Parenting approach.

Mindfulness meditation opens the door to being your best self

In fact, research proves that people who practice mindfulness meditation experience more inner peace and have brains that get wired to handle stress better. And let’s face it—being a parent can be really intense some days! So why not make it easier by training your brain to help you manage stress better. Because if you are more adept at finding your inner pause button, then you can turn the tide toward a teachable moment when things get tough. As a result, you will begin looking for the learning opportunities in life—instead of unconsciously training your brain to complain when things aren’t going as planned. Put simply, mindfulness is having an ongoing, active awareness about what is going on in the now moment. Without mindfulness most of us find ourselves with one foot in the past and one foot in the future, making it very difficult to be balanced in the present.

Find your balance in the now moment

Mindfulness meditation encourages you to neutrally observe the thoughts, feelings and sensations you experience moment to moment. As you become aware of any wandering thoughts, you just allow them to pass on through. Because the intention is not to get involved with the thoughts or to judge them. The goal is to just be aware of each mental note as it arises. And you can even imagine that you are listening to the radio but allowing whatever notes, songs or commercials that might be playing—to become background noise. If you get distracted, just return to your breath. In time, you will be able to consciously “tune” your mind to the peaceful station of silence you really want to listen to.

Focusing on your breath, refocuses your mind

Whenever your mind wanders (and it will at first), the way back to the present is through your breath. And by not engaging with or reacting to whatever thoughts, feelings or sensations are passing through your field of awareness. After meditating consistently, you will notice that your mind is clearer and that it wanders less and less. When I first started meditating, my mind wandered like a gypsy. Going here and there trying to sell me on all the random “wares” it could conjure up. Although I have a very active imagination, I know that focusing my mind makes all the difference. Because then I can translate that creativity into something tangible. And just 10 minutes of regular mindfulness meditation does the trick. Whenever your mind wanders, just gently redirect your awareness to your breath. Then, you will be back on a zen track.

Try these simple steps to creating a regular mindfulness meditation practice:

1. Choose a meditation space

Select an ideal space for your meditation. It can be wherever you can sit comfortably with ease and minimal distraction. Place a meditation cushion or cozy chair there. You can zen-out the space if you want, to really inspire your meditative purpose.

2. Choose a convenient time

Also, try to establish a regular time to meditate that fits your schedule and natural rhythm. Begin with 10 minutes. Many of my clients set a timer on their phones and listen to their favorite chill-lax music. Just start with whatever you can do. Later you can sit longer or more frequently as your practice grows. By making mindfulness meditation a part of your normal routine, you will soon find your zen place more easily throughout your day.

3. Make yourself comfortable

Next, find a posture on the chair or cushion, in which you can easily sit, without creating tension or discomfort in your body. Let your body be firmly planted on the earth, your hands resting easily, your heart present and open. Also, keep your eyes gently closed.

4. Set an intention

Consider setting an intention to be mindfully aware of any thoughts, feelings or sensations. And just notice them without judgment as you relax. Allow whatever is present inside of you to just be, no matter what surfaces. Then, do a head-to-toe body scan, becoming aware of any tightness or stress in your body.

5. Focus on your breath

As you become aware of your breath, focus on deep belly-breathing. Pay attention to feeling the sensation of just breathing. Take a few slow purposeful breaths to sense where you can feel it most easily, as coolness or warmth in your nostrils or throat, as movement in your chest, or the rise and fall of your belly.

6. When your mind wanders—Just breathe!

Begin to notice when your mind wanders. Whenever you become aware of this, no matter how long or short a time you have been away, simply come back to your breathe. Let it be okay, because it is and the allowance of what is—IS mindfulness. Remember that the awareness of your breath is your road back home to the present moment.

7. Acknowledge yourself

And when you are finished meditating, take a moment to acknowledge yourself. Thank yourself for nurturing your whole mind, body & spirit with mindfulness meditation. Gratitude trains your brain for optimism. And learning to appreciate yourself and to use positive self-talk is the best way to silence the inner critic.

More zen is just an app away

Developing an ongoing mindfulness meditation practice will give you the most mindfulness bang for your buck. And some of my clients like to use meditation apps. You can try Calm or Headspace, they are apps that make it easy to start meditating today. Truly, mindfulness meditation is worth the small investment of time. Because it always gives you a greater return by improving the overall quality of your day and family life. And it doesn’t matter how you make it happen—as long as you do it.

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Categories: : Holistic Psychology, Mindful Attachment Parenting, Self-Care