Avoid Mom Burnout With These Mindful Me-Time Strategies

Molly Holmes, LMFT Author

Jan 29, 2023 |

Parenting mindfully can be so much harder than anyone expects. These simple self-care strategies are the lifeline to being the best mother you can be!

Mindful Me-Time Strategies 

Being a mother comes with a whole new set of responsibilities that can be overwhelming at times. Self-care is the answer! To bring forth and raise a little human is the most worthy endeavor there is. Even if it is sometimes the hardest. There are no words for the profound love and almost unbearable compassion we can feel watching them go through the lumps and bumps of life. And we willingly give up so much on an ongoing basis because what we get back in seeing them healthy and happy is priceless. But, how do you make getting mindful me-time easier in your hectic day?

The modern “supermother” juggling act can make balance difficult.

As a result, it can be challenging to know some days where we start and where our children end. While we keep all the balls of responsibility in the air. And holding boundaries may seem impossible at times when they are little. The running joke is that you can’t even go to the bathroom by yourself. Even though you devotedly make healthy meals, tidy up the house, help your children with homework and lovingly tuck them into bed—you may feel like something is missing. Left unaddressed, that sense will still be there the next day when you get up and do it all over again. That nagging feeling that you are forgetting something important gnaws at you in the corners of your mind. Until you remember that what you put on the back burner is you.

Ask yourself the question: “When was the last time I had some quality me-time?”

The cultural norm of “motherhood as martyrdom” influences the lives of most mothers today. Beliefs like “self-care is selfish” can take the form of mom-guilt.  Like when you think about letting the dishes sit so you can relax for a few minutes. However, mothering-up without replenishing yourself can lead you down the road to burnout. To avoid this, all you have to do is just say “no” to mom-guilt and spend a few minutes a day doing self-care. Because the truth is that you can not take care of your family if your cup is empty.

Self-care is not selfish—it is the lifeline to being the best mother you can be.

It is essential to bringing forward your best self in all areas of your life, which is why it is foundational to the Mindful Attachment Parenting approach. When I was a new mother with a baby with colic, there were days that I did not even shower. Back then, self-care seemed like a coveted experience that got moved to my bucket list instead of my daily to-do list. Running on empty took a toll and I was lucky enough to have a friend who shared her story of how she became chronically ill from doing the same thing. She wisely reminded me that motherhood is a marathon and that we have to learn to pace ourselves. That realization hit home for me.

“What Is The Most Important Thing We Can Give To Ourselves And Our Family?—Self-Care!”

Diving deep into the waters of my cultural beliefs about caretaking, I emerged with the pearl of wisdom that I was worthy of my own care. Also, I knew that I needed to model self-care so my daughter would grow up and become a woman and mother who takes care of herself too. When we do this there is a healing ripple effect of greater balance for everyone across generations. Transforming the false belief that “self-care is selfish” to the truth that “self-care is self-aware,” led me to Mindful Parenting. Mindfulness became my new mommy modus operandi and I learned how to listen to myself. Really listen. Being mindful means being aware. It means paying attention to that still small voice inside. The one that tells us when we need to take care of ourselves.

You will have more to give to your family when you give to yourself, because a little me-time goes a long way.

And when we give ourselves that gift, we receive what we need to have the energy to truly enjoy things like playtime with our children—rather than just going through the motions. By reducing stress and improving the overall quality of your relationships, self-care tends to make everything better. Fitting me-time into the daily hussle of your busy life is sometimes tough, I know. That is why I created these simple self-care strategies to make getting more me-time easier for you.

Try These Powerful Me-Time Strategies And Have More Energy For The People And Things You Love Most!

• Happiness Jar Me-Time. Ask yourself what makes you happy?  Then, cut out strips of paper and write down things you can do that bring you bliss. Maybe you like to do DIY projects or to garden or go for long walks or maybe spa treatments are more your jam?  Think about your favorite hobbies and make sure you include them. Next, put all of your ideas in a mason jar. Pick one and find your happy place! Can’t get me-time at the moment and still want to get crafty with it? Do monthly green crafting with your kiddos. Teach them about sustainability and have fun while doing it.

• 10 minutes to Zen Me-Time. Meditation will give you the most self-care bang for your buck. After you put the kids to bed, download the app Calm and try the option: “7 Days of Calm —daily 10-minute guided meditations.” Then, you will discover that zen is only minutes away. The 10 minutes go by fast so don't be concerned if at first your mind wanders. In a short time, every second will start to feel like you are at a retreat for your mind.  Take deep belly breaths and leverage your zen all day.

• Multitasking Me-Time. Make the most of your daily routine by mindfully pairing things you are already doing with self-care strategies. Listen to your favorite music while you shower. Recite positive affirmations in your head while you get ready in the morning. Also, you can hold an intention to actually sit down while you eat and mindfully prepare, smell and taste every bite. Bonus: you will feel more satisfied with less, making it easier to stay healthy and trim!

• Me-Time Management. Use a bullet journal to creatively organize your life and free up more me-time. Actually, it only takes 5 minutes to set it up. And it is a journal, planner, and self-care diary all in one—a trifecta of amazing support! Research says that our brains actually work better in analogue and writing things versus typing them helps us process and retain them better. Mindful time management means more time and some of that can be used for me-time. Ready to bullet journal your way to more overall me-time? 

• Pamper Me-Time. Make everyday a mini spa day with good for you and the planet me-time treats. Look and feel your best with natural and organic products that are eco-friendly and cruelty-free. Enjoy a non-toxic mani-pedi with a natural nail polish or wash your worries away with an Epsom salt soak. No time for a long bath? No problem! Instead, you can indulge yourself with your favorite natural body scrub that is hopefully filled with essential oils to elevate your mood while you shower. Pay mindful attention to anywhere that needs extra TLC and then scrub the stress away!

Because your health and happiness is non-negotiable 

Use these simple self-care strategies to make getting much needed me-time more doable and see how much better you feel! Just start where you are and try mixing one of these suggestions into your day this week. Soon you will find that getting me-time just got a whole lot easier!

Sign up for my FREE COURSE 5 Simple Steps to Parent With Less Stress & More Mindfulness to learn other key Zen Mommy MAP strategies!

Categories: : Holistic Psychology, Mindful Attachment Parenting, Self-Care